Anxiety In Certain Situations

You've done your research, you took the training, you know what to do, you prepared as much as you can, you even practiced several times. Yet somehow you still freeze, or stumble over your words, or forget half the things you were supposed to do, or simply chicken out at the last moment. 

Later on, you wonder why you weren't able to execute as you envisioned. You wonder what other skills you are lacking. You wonder if you need to "put more effort" into it.

But sometimes it's not your lack of trying. There is a part of you that is holding you back... your subconscious. And we need to address your subconscious blocks before you can easily execute in certain situations. It's like turning off the parking brake before pressing on the acceleration pedal.

Our minds are made up of two parts: the conscious mind and the sub-conscious mind.

The conscious mind is powerful. It's the wellspring of creativity, it gives you the ability to learn and also to choose a new path and future.

The subconscious mind supports the conscious mind by taking care of all other things that could distract the conscious mind. So you don't have to constantly think about these other things. In itself, the subconscious mind is habitual, automatic.

• Bodily functions - The subconscious mind controls all your bodily functions: your heartbeat, your breathing, your digestion and circulatory systems.

• Learned Behaviors - Once you've learned something it gets relegated to your subconscious mind. For example, when you learn to drive a car, you have to consciously think of all the mechanics of pressing on the gas or break, steering the wheel, changing gears. But once you've learned it, driving becomes automatic such that your conscious mind is free to think of other things while you are driving, like what to make for dinner when you get home, the email you're supposed to write to your colleagues, etc.

• Likes and Dislikes - As you experience life, you make a decision on what you like and what you don't like. Unless you consciously decide to change these preferences, you will always like, not like or be indifferent about all sorts of things (e.g. broccoli or certain types of activities or certain types of music). You will automatically choose those things you like.

• Emotions - Certain events and people could also serve as triggers for you to experience certain emotions. Some time in your past you've become habituated to feeling a certain way around certain situations or people. And your subconscious automatically generates these feelings when you encounter similar situations and people. Some of these emotional changes happen so quickly that looking back, you wonder where it came from.

• Beliefs - And you have learned that the world works a certain way. This becomes your reality. Sometimes, this view may be true until it no longer works in the new situation that you are in. Most of the time, this view defines the boundaries of what you can do and what you cannot do. And subconsciously, you automatically stay within these boundaries because that's what you have defined as safe. 

What happens when  you go out of your comfort zone?

The subconscious mind determines what you do, what you like, how you feel, and how you think by making you feel uncomfortable whenever you stray from these pre-determined patterns, your comfort zone.

The bigger you step out of your comfort zone, the greater the anxiety, frustration or whatever uncomfortable feeling your subconscious could generate.

So one trick you could do is to take micro steps. This way your subconscious doesn't know the small changes you make and doesn't send out alarm signals. Take the first micro step, and once you're habituated to the new "normal", you take the next micro step, and the next, and the next. Some call this "Fake it till you make it" or "Practice makes perfect".

But what if we could bypass this long process and re-program the subconscious with a new pattern? Then what you are trying to do wouldn't be outside of your comfort zone but will be part of your comfort zone. 

True, you will have to get better at this new skill, but it wouldn't it be easier without the nervousness and anxiety that keeps distracting you and holding you back?

I've used this process to build my new life. Every time I hit an internal block I would address the uncomfortable emotions so I could continue to move forward. And I found that I was able to experience more expansion and growth this way.

Contact me at the email below if you are interested in finding out more. Please bring a specific situation you would like to address at our consultation so you can experience the process for yourself and see if this is a fit for you.